Ask a regular person what they think about pedophiles and children mixing, and they will recoil in horror. To them, it's a combination akin to water and electricity. But I would like to differ. I think the two go together like wine and cheese, or coffee and cake.

In this article, which is pretty much a retaliation to those attacking and threatening MAP activists of late, I will explore why responsible MAPs should spend time with young people, and also discuss ways to meet a young friend for a platonic friendship.

A foreword on scope

This article discusses how MAPs can make friends with young people, specifically children and teens. It does not encourage criminalized behavior of any form. While I do not personally believe that consensual AMSC is inherently harmful, the consequences for both the older and younger partner can be severe due to the hysterical reaction of other adults. These consequences include serious harm to the young person from the 'justice' system and predatory therapists, not to mention the obvious sociolegal risks for the adult, such as imprisonment, sex offender registration, and the inability to rebuild any sort of life after release. Having a criminalized sexual relationship with a young person is not recommended.

And if anyone asks, "then why would a MAP be writing this article?", that person is a piece of shit projecting their own shortcomings onto a community about which they understand very little.

The MAP-minor connection

Mu's survey of the MAP community in 2024 revealed that we have an incredible affinity for children and teens. In particular, it was found that MAPs experience greater empathy for young people, enjoying a unique emotional connection with them and preferring their company over that of adults. Not long ago, I also wrote about how minor-attraction is something of a mentoring orientation, seemingly more altruistic and possibly even less 'predatory' than typical male sexuality.

Based on my own experience as a teacher and mentor of many children and teens, I can say with confidence that there are also young people who experience a deep emotional connection with MAPs. I've had situations where parents were worried not about me potentially being a pedophile, but about their son bothering me too often. Many of these boys had loving parents and friends their own age, but they shared a unique bond with me. It's not standard, but it does happen.

Additionally, there are sadly a number of children and teens who do not have loving parents or friends their own age. For these young people, a responsible adult friend is of deep importance. If it's a MAP who doesn't take advantage of the young person's needs, such a friendship can only be a good thing. To suggest otherwise would be a projection of one's personal hatred and prejudice onto a mutually beneficial friendship... that of course being something of which 'normal' adults are constantly guilty.

There are also many families with two working parents, who can't always easily afford childcare. This is unfortunate, but it's a reality that shows no sign of going away any time soon. Having a responsible MAP neighbor happy to take care of the children is very much a positive. It happens more often than people may think, because the MAP is normally a trustworthy person and nothing bad comes of it.

One very frustrating stereotype is that MAPs 'abandon' their young friends or mentees once they outgrow the MAP's age of sexual attraction, and this is quite unfair. I'm still in contact with a number of the boys I mentored, now adults. One of them even caught a flight to visit me last year; it's a good thing I wasn't an abusive friend, because he is absolutely ripped now!

MAP mental health

In addition to being enjoyable in and of itself, spending time with young people is crucial for a MAP's mental health. Take a look at some MAP support boards, and you will find threads about people addicted to following child or teen models on social media, obsessed with young characters as was the case with Nicholas Prosper, and so on. This is not good for the MAP, nor for those around him or her.

And while I'm kind of criticizing others, I must admit that I drive myself a bit crazy with MAP activism at times. Mu's MAP Forum and other services have been under attack by script kiddies this week, and as such I've been focusing my energies much more on playing with my students after class. I honestly feel a lot better for it. Just a few years ago, when I was focused almost entirely on work (with children) and YFs, I was in a much better space mentally.

This is not to say that MAPs should go crazy chasing YFs, nor that they should abandon activism or stop looking at legal images of young people. But spending time with young people is grounding, and makes you feel loved as opposed to ostracized by the entire world. It is pretty much a necessity for maintaining decent mental health as a MAP, and it's not as if you can simply 'get help' as the moronic public regularly scream.

Changing the world one young person at a time

In the anglo world, where even platonic adult-minor friendships are quite stigmatized, maintaining such a friendship also has an activist benefit. There are many more MAPs than most people realize, and if each one of us befriended at least one young person, and left them with a positive memory of the friendship, this would go some way toward teaching the public that such friendships can be very beneficial.

Additionally, it is very much the case that the more people do anything at all, the more normal it seems. Regularly seeing respectable adults spending time with young people will gradually nudge the masses into accepting that it is not a huge deal.

How to make friends with a young person

Earlier this year, I used a carefully trained and primed AI bot to write a guide on befriending children and teens. It details how to do so, step-by-step, without attracting negative attention or crossing any legal boundaries. The guide does not teach readers how to 'groom' anyone for sex, and as such it is entirely lawful. Now, let's summarize the key takeaways.

• Earning the trust of the local community is paramount. If other adults know and respect you, they're unlikely to see you as one of those evil pedophiles.
• Hobby clubs that attract both adults and young people would be a great choice for meeting new young friends, but you really should choose something that you actually enjoy. You can demonstrate your trustworthiness to a group, while at the same time forming acquaintance with young people.
• Mentoring organizations, and jobs that have you work with local children or teens for a limited period of time (such as summer camps), are other good options for finding young friends.
• Living in a family apartment complex, if you can tolerate having many neighbors close by, may also work; you can kick a ball around with the neighbors' children, play tag, etc.
• If there are a significant number of young people interacting with you, it's inevitable that at least one of them will seek to befriend the adult who pays them so much attention. When this happens, it is perfectly acceptable to show interest in the young person; such will typically be appreciated unless you're really creepy.
• At some point, the young person will ask to spend time outside of the setting in which you met them. At that time, it is essential to communicate with parents, and sound willing but not overly eager.
• Maintaining contact with parents, and letting them know what their children do with you, is important for maintaining the friendship. For example, if you cook something together at your house, send the parents a picture of their child holding the food they cooked.

You can do this even in a western country unless you make it weird. And despite what some MAPs may say - that they're too socially awkward, weird, or shy - believe me when I tell you that young people are simply drawn to any MAP who makes a genuine effort. Whether it's body language they pick up on, the fact that we treat them with respect and pay them more attention, or whatever else, it really does feel like magic sometimes.

In my case, I have been able to make YFs through work in the past, and I've recently had boys from work ask to hang out on weekends (though I decided against it for now). I'd recommend extreme caution in an anglo country, but if you don't sound too eager and the parents and employer are comfortable, it is possible in some places.

And if you don't want to make a friend...

Not everyone wants to make a new friend. In fact, I am currently just not in the mood for a really close friendship. However, it is generally beneficial for a MAP (and the young people involved!) to at least work with young people.

In western countries, there is actually a fairly high demand for men in post-kindergarten settings. Not surprisingly, most non-MAP males are terrified of working with children, lest they be accused of being a MAP. Ironically, this often leaves us to fulfill the demand! The bastards reap what they sow. Although applying for such positions may feel 'scary', the worst that can realistically happen is being denied the job. Just apply if you are qualified.

If you would prefer to get away from the west, there are TEFL opportunities in almost every country around the world; the greatest demand is in China, Japan, Korea, Thailand, and Vietnam. These locales, while far from pro-MAP, are still much less hysterical than anglo countries. Requirements are also reasonably light, varying slightly by destination. However, a clean background check from your home country will typically be required. For those with stronger qualifications, a 'real' teaching job at a bilingual or international school is an option, but it will probably come with more scrutiny from 'professional' expat teachers.

If you'd like advice from a seasoned expat and teacher, send me an e-mail, but note that I will not give away my specific location, nor help anyone who implies that they plan to do anything unlawful.

The horror!

Despite what 'normal' adults may state - that they oppose MAPs because they believe we will 'hurt children' - their primary motivation is a socially ingrained disgust at our thoughts, arguably our very existence. The more we express these feelings even lawfully, by identifying as a MAP or forming platonic friendships with young people, the more we offend their precious sensibilities. The idea of a MAP being around a child or teen no doubt elicits visceral disgust in the average person. But we fix this not simply by trying to explain the difference in the style of VirPed ("what I think about every day would be truly horrific if acted upon, but I promise I'll never do it"). We fix this through normalization. By normalizing adult-minor friendships.

It's quite ironic that the world, via its wanton stigmatization and ostracism of MAPs, pushes us even further toward young people. I would never bother trying to make friends with a regular anglo adult, given their attitudes toward MAPs. Children, on the other hand, have not been so thoroughly consumed by the hysteria, and they never will be because they are not so heavily socialized. In more or less the same vein, the silly denial of service attacks against Mu and other sites this past week didn't make me stop being a MAP. I just decided to focus more on spending time with cute boys after class, and now I'm writing an article about how other MAPs should spend more time with young people, too. I'm guessing that's not what any of our enemies wanted, but it's what happened.

The bastards want to make us go away. Let's push ourselves in their faces, instead. Make finding a YF your New Year's Resolution, and normalize adult-minor friendships!