I have long made the argument that MAPs are way too chill about the horrific state of affairs we face in the modern world. We need to be far more aggressive, not pitifully groveling for the right to merely exist, not offering wild concessions for 'acceptance'. And yet my call to anger and aggression does sometimes suggest a harsher reality than might be fair. Because while we do have many enemies, and a number of them are truly vile, we do also have friends, and neutrals, and those who quietly tolerate us should we be nice to kids.

I moved to a new place not that long ago, and I have already befriended several local boys. 'Common sense', to western folk at least, would dictate that doing such required a performative dance around ensuring proper parental permission had been granted, replete with awkward introductions and sideways glances. But well, I don't know the parents well at all, and I didn't tell the boys they must ask their parents before hanging out with me. Nonetheless, I behave normally and confidently around our neighborhood, and the parents are aware that I hang out with their boys, for which they are apparently grateful. I think my confidence is key.

It's vital to note that I am genuinely nice to the boys, and even declined the curious wandering hands of one YF to whom I am very much attracted (regular readers will be aware it’s not the first time in my life I’ve had to do this). And with the boys going home happy, and guardians and caregivers being partially relieved of duties, there really isn't anything for anyone to complain about. I have no idea if some of the parents suspect I’m a MAP, and frankly I don't really care all that much. It's not a crime to care for boys while being a MAP. It's arguably our purpose in nature.

I have, in a past community, been suspected of being a MAP for nothing more than having YFs. I was never actually accused to my face, but boys told me what they’d heard, and I smoothed things over with many of those who were suspicious. I’m not going to claim it wasn’t a deeply uncomfortable situation to be in, but ultimately I kept my YFs and stayed in that community for quite some time. I left for reasons largely unrelated to being a MAP.

Sticking it to your detractors

It’s one thing for a shut in to be like this.

This was a comment posted on YouTube in reference to me being a teacher, following a rather dull video about my writings. I found this comment more interesting than any of the comments calling for my death or trying to get under my skin. It strikes at the heart of anti-MAPness, where the goal is not to protect children, but to make a 'witch' suffer. The suffering of MAPs excites our detractors, and us living some semblance of a life horrifies them.

It is crucial to be your best self, interacting with children as much as you can. When I have YFs holding me tight while watching a scary movie, I swell with immense pleasure at how it would make our enemies feel. And yes, that sentence ended differently to how you might have expected!

Of course, the fact that I have been able to make a group of YFs, who hang out at my house, proves that the world isn't entirely as we see it online. This is a valuable lesson for those who imagine that comments on news articles, and on social media hate channels, represent everyone. There are probably people in the community where I live now who at least suspect that I'm a MAP, but with boys pounding on my door like Interpol, they may well feel as much pity and confusion as anything else.

Caveats

Perhaps the biggest challenge in maintaining a group of YFs is that of managing the kids themselves. YFs will knock on your door when you're sleeping or want to rest, or possibly while you're writing a radical pro-pedophile article in my case! They will fight over you, and fight with each other about various trivial matters, not to mention make quite a mess of your house. They’ll invite friends, who will in turn invite their friends, and things can quickly get out of hand. It can become almost like a job, which is exhausting should you actually have a real job. For me, I'm doing my regular teaching job, managing YFs, and also trying to participate in online MAP communities at the same time. It's a bit ridiculous.

YFs might also try to initiate playful sexual contact, which sounds like a good thing but isn't. The ones that do this are also the ones who will tell everyone in the entire world about the fun little game they played... so you'd better be sure you have the strength to tell them no.

Having a group of YFs is much better than not, but it isn't paradise. Still, what's the alternative?